人家都会羡慕我，
羡慕我有个很好的男朋友
但，事实永远是残酷的
又有谁懂？
有谁懂他那么的依赖？
有谁懂他的谨慎是错？
有谁懂他的仔细是罪？
又有谁懂他有个不擅于处理感情的我？
有谁懂他有个不体谅的我？
有些事，
有些时候，是我觉得不可能会发生的
就因为我们的性格，它存在了
从前的我们，从来没有犯下的错
如今是为了什么让它出现了？
只是因为大家太压力，太累了？
我就是那么倔强，什么事情只要自己可以，
我不需要你们任何一个的帮忙
如果可以，我不需要任何的解释
如果可以，我不需要任何的交代
可是因为爱情是两个人的事情
我学会了这些，
唯有这个坏习惯，
只要我觉得好，我就要你听
因为我觉得这对大家都好
无论是你，是谁都一样
发生任何事我会选择发唠叨后继续把事情做好
自己处理自己的事，对我来说是多么的正常！
但这一切一切对你来说
变成了我眼中的‘理所当然’
我已经不懂得处理有问题的我们，
不要问我任何意见
我只会说我不懂，不知道，随便
或许那天的到来我会像以前那样坦然接受
不会有任何异议
那是我的问题？
还是我们的？
2013年10月20日星期日
2013年10月14日星期一
2013年9月16日星期一
Off balance
Something keep running in my head
Too stress? Too nervous ? Too boring?
I don't know
Getting more and more fragile than who I am
Difficult to go along with things or incident which oppose my wish
What happened to me?
I know u tried so hard to cheer me
Find ways to make me happy and laugh
But I will just automatically switch it into bad mood in certain period
May be final too stress.may be lai ye hormone off balance. May be I'm too tired d..
I hope I can go back to normal state as fast as possible then I can enjoy my holiday well=)
I miss those simple and normal days that we gone through together.. =]
Too stress? Too nervous ? Too boring?
I don't know
Getting more and more fragile than who I am
Difficult to go along with things or incident which oppose my wish
What happened to me?
I know u tried so hard to cheer me
Find ways to make me happy and laugh
But I will just automatically switch it into bad mood in certain period
May be final too stress.may be lai ye hormone off balance. May be I'm too tired d..
I hope I can go back to normal state as fast as possible then I can enjoy my holiday well=)
I miss those simple and normal days that we gone through together.. =]
2013年3月2日星期六
你的快乐呢？
我要的快乐很简单。
前天，阿姨来了通电话问我要回家吗
哈哈哈~我停顿了片刻才拒绝了她
还有一堆assignments 和midterm
这时候回家，开课时就死定了。。
却是这个星期，朋友们都纷纷回家
说什么很久没回家了，有些还说想家了
那我呢？
顿时领悟到何谓‘想家’。
从小我都没有这号习惯，父母也了解我不是个会常粘家的小孩
加上我排行第二，更是最叛逆的那个
所以从小即使到外边旅游，暂住，我唯一不舍得就是离开那地方的时候
却不是那安乐窝。。。
长大了，不能常回家了。。才学会什么是想家
或许只是纯粹回家睡个觉
吃妈妈煮的饭，打包小食回来也值得安慰
爸妈都养了我21年，这么大了才会想念他们
此刻的我觉得自己即好笑，也羞耻
已经过了两天，还对自己说出拒绝的话感到内疚
*如果可以回家，那该有多好*
不太像自己会说出的话。。
前天，阿姨来了通电话问我要回家吗
哈哈哈~我停顿了片刻才拒绝了她
还有一堆assignments 和midterm
这时候回家，开课时就死定了。。
却是这个星期，朋友们都纷纷回家
说什么很久没回家了，有些还说想家了
那我呢？
顿时领悟到何谓‘想家’。
从小我都没有这号习惯，父母也了解我不是个会常粘家的小孩
加上我排行第二，更是最叛逆的那个
所以从小即使到外边旅游，暂住，我唯一不舍得就是离开那地方的时候
却不是那安乐窝。。。
长大了，不能常回家了。。才学会什么是想家
或许只是纯粹回家睡个觉
吃妈妈煮的饭，打包小食回来也值得安慰
爸妈都养了我21年，这么大了才会想念他们
此刻的我觉得自己即好笑，也羞耻
已经过了两天，还对自己说出拒绝的话感到内疚
*如果可以回家，那该有多好*
不太像自己会说出的话。。
2013年2月25日星期一
life
haih...
as a 'professional' psychologist or counsellor,
i should psycho myself and comfort myself that i have already done my best for everything.
i've tried my best in doing everything...
i knew im not smart as other, i study hard, i really do..
although i had catch up with some pointer which i kinda satisfied with
as sikis sikit lama jadi bukit,
if i keep on pay effort ,i knew the cgpa will increase slowly.
but... life wasn't that easy
i almost lost contact with the world which i dislike this the most!
i don't like to be isolated and the feeling of lonely..
there was an incident and make me realized that it was my fault
as i didn't update myself with them and other do not responsible to inform me for everything.
i felt sorry and sad...and i decided to take some actions.
i successfully build the bond and feel more comfort with that.
until i went back this cny,
is this my fault again? or i over think again?
why i have so many irrational beliefs ?..............
i couldn't feel the warmness that we ever had last time.
mayb we didnt't talk much n it makes me felt like "this is not us"
somehow i can't really take it when she say something bad to me.
i know we are not those friends out there but....
i can't say anything as i knew u r just joking but it makes me feel sad
and i don't know how to persuade myself to take it easy.
life is always miserable~
things and people will always change
hi bye friends mean nothing to me.
i want true friends who understand each other well..
i always feel that people who said ' i hate to grow up' 'i want the time back' are childish
and now.....i think they are right.
human tend to stay in the past which they think that it is the best moment they ever had.
so do i.....
as a 'professional' psychologist or counsellor,
i should psycho myself and comfort myself that i have already done my best for everything.
i've tried my best in doing everything...
i knew im not smart as other, i study hard, i really do..
although i had catch up with some pointer which i kinda satisfied with
as sikis sikit lama jadi bukit,
if i keep on pay effort ,i knew the cgpa will increase slowly.
but... life wasn't that easy
i almost lost contact with the world which i dislike this the most!
i don't like to be isolated and the feeling of lonely..
there was an incident and make me realized that it was my fault
as i didn't update myself with them and other do not responsible to inform me for everything.
i felt sorry and sad...and i decided to take some actions.
i successfully build the bond and feel more comfort with that.
until i went back this cny,
is this my fault again? or i over think again?
why i have so many irrational beliefs ?..............
i couldn't feel the warmness that we ever had last time.
mayb we didnt't talk much n it makes me felt like "this is not us"
somehow i can't really take it when she say something bad to me.
i know we are not those friends out there but....
i can't say anything as i knew u r just joking but it makes me feel sad
and i don't know how to persuade myself to take it easy.
life is always miserable~
things and people will always change
hi bye friends mean nothing to me.
i want true friends who understand each other well..
i always feel that people who said ' i hate to grow up' 'i want the time back' are childish
and now.....i think they are right.
human tend to stay in the past which they think that it is the best moment they ever had.
so do i.....
订阅：
博文 (Atom)